TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Swine flu is the new snow day.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
