i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize