Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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