we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize