Texts From Last Night

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  (702): View more from Nevada

  Its only 8 and she is already passed out

  (1-702): View more from Nevada

  Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2

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  (702): Its only 8 and she is already passed out (1-702): Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2 http://tfl.nu/cu8c
  Replies (73) Good night (1500) Bad night (3830)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.

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  (615): I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance. http://tfl.nu/av3i
  Replies (13) Good night (2982) Bad night (1129)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later

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  (513): i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later http://tfl.nu/g0hd
  Replies (24) Good night (4359) Bad night (1222)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.

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  (413): I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date. (215): You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds. http://tfl.nu/2p7v
  Replies (38) Good night (6025) Bad night (1152)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations

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  (416): I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations http://tfl.nu/ujgo
  Replies (13) Good night (1028) Bad night (4846)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.

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  (319): Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again. http://tfl.nu/9aen
  Replies (10) Good night (3672) Bad night (1387)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.

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  (724): Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately. http://tfl.nu/qxtl
  Replies (8) Good night (2442) Bad night (1411)
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  (619): View more from California

  By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.

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  (619): By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time. http://tfl.nu/je0g
  Replies (14) Good night (2564) Bad night (944)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe

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  (307): I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe http://tfl.nu/mnt3
  Replies (5) Good night (1923) Bad night (761)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own

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  (612): I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own http://tfl.nu/8p1h
  Replies (3) Good night (1276) Bad night (579)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.

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  (443): Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today. http://tfl.nu/rdca
  Replies (4) Good night (659) Bad night (922)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?

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  (916): Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right? http://tfl.nu/1so7
  Replies (2) Good night (638) Bad night (352)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.

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  (720): In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day. http://tfl.nu/haxq
  Replies (3) Good night (823) Bad night (294)
• Favorite

  (731): View more from Tennessee

  Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too

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  (731): Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too http://tfl.nu/4c0u
  Replies (8) Good night (1322) Bad night (570)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands

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  (330): You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands http://tfl.nu/9y5f
  Replies (1) Good night (622) Bad night (299)

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