he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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