you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
