Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
