i just wanna soil my oats bro
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
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