i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize