so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
