Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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