I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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