im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Randomize
