I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
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