Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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