I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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