that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
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