If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
why is half of my head shaved?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
