i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
