they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
