How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize