you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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