I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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