My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Randomize