Already got asked if we're dating
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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