Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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