u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
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Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
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I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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