Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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