I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Randomize
