i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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