i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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