Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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