It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
