But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
