I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
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