if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize