he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Randomize
