do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
