They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Randomize
