we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
