I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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