you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize