What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
