hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
