new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
