No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
