Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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