Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
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