We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
29 Super Simple DIY Drinking Games
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.