no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
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